Decisions, decisions 

I have so much trouble making decisions.  Trust me, it took me a week to decide to write about this.

I’m not talking about life-changing choices like switching jobs or finding a new apartment (even though, yes, I have been tossing those ideas around in my noggin for years).  I’m talking about little things like my husband asking me what I want for dinner, or what I want to watch on tv.

When I’m presented with a question, no matter how small, it immediately puts me into Fight, Flight, or Freeze mode.  I instantly see the past, the future, and all alternate dimensions.  I process every possible choice and the outcome it may have.  I usually end up freezing and giving him no information.

Sometimes it goes the other way, though.  I couldn’t care less about what food I put into my face or what show I want to watch.  I just can’t muster up the energy to give a hoot about what’s going on around me.  In this case, I just tell him I need suggestions, or whatever he wants to do.

It’s not just when someone else presents me with a choice.  I will think about something to death even when I’m by myself.  Do I read?  Eat?  Nap?  Watch tv?  Get lost in the rabbit hole that is the internet?  Color?  Shower?  Do laundry?  Dishes?  I only have time to do one or two of them, so I’d better make the right decision or somewhere in the world a tiny kitten will lose his ears.

 

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